Any INFP with scorpio stellium eternally confused about their type?


#1

Hello, I am new to the forum.

I have been spending an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out my mbti type, which has been very confusing, but I think I just have to accept that finding the perfect reflection/fit is like finding the perfect soulmate; impossible.

I used to test INFx and recently more often INFP. I think that my behavior during stable times of life reflects INFP, however my heavily plutonian astrology chart (moon, mercury, venus, pluto in Scorpio, Sun (libra) and mars (libra) in 8th house virgo) has created a sense of drama that is not typically an INFP thing. I very much related to the devouring, unbalanced and violent INFJ love style throughout most of my twenties… and also spent many years immersing myself in studying the dark side of human psychology/condition. I was obsessed with Lars Von Trier for a while… Dogville, anyone? That reminds me of INFJ vengeance… and the main character for most of the movie acts like the epitome of INFP morality, then turns around and… I won’t spoil the movie in case you haven’t seen it… but does anyone else familiar with Lars Von Trier’s work find that it resonates with INFJdom?

Anyway, perhaps I was just an INFP having a crisis as Saturn rolled over all my scorpio planets… I relate to both archetypes but my actions in response to being hurt 70% of the time is passive… I don’t know why I’m so concerned with figuring out what type I truly am, but it might have to do with paranoia that I am unable to see the truth of my life and relationships due to being easily taken advantage of (INFP). Sometimes I get annoyed at my own jellyfishness because life is not made of pillows. Maybe I’m just in denial of my type, INFP.

How do INFPs gain confidence and not roil in inability to make decisions and have a sense of self???


#2

I am your soulmate, so check that off your list…


#3

Wow! Hi soulmate.


#4

Sup, turtlejet. (pronounced turt legit)


#5

@lunar any thoughts?

hi :turtle: :airplane:
I want to ask a few questions.
what’s your hobby?
what do you do in your leisure time?
and what mbti types were the people you were in relationships with if you know?


#6

Hi Super!

Hobbies include writing (I used to be an active poet doing readings etc), art, astrology, all kinds of stereotypically INFP stuff.

These days my leisure time is spent reading because I am experience a sluggish, stuck time in my creative spirit. I’m in grad school for a healthcare thing (because INFP career), work part time, coparent part time, and have struggles with time management. I really have not been pursuing hobbies.

I dated an INTJ once but we were young and both very immature versions of ourselves. I remember feeling like I wanted to swallow him whole. I had lots of random intense things with people I don’t know the types of and tended to jump in right away without figuring out if we were compatible. One I think was also INFP. Another was a Sagittarius, superficial creative type… Relationships activate attachment anxiety in me. I had a special soulmate who was probably a T type but lack of sex stopped it from progressing… it killed me to break up and led to lots of risky behavior afterwards from not dealing with those feelings.

My current partner might be ENTP but it’s really hard to tell because he seems enneagram 9 and since settling down has become less and less spastic and more content/complacent. In this relationship I am the all-over-the-place one. I sometimes feel like he does not understand my feelings but he tries. [Anyone know type 9 ENTP and aren’t they sweet?]

I get anxious often because of a vague feeling of wrongness that I cannot pinpoint. Fear of judgment out of nowhere. I want to develop strength and belief in myself as a creative being.


What's your enneagram?
#7

Ok, I just read Blake’s post about Scorpio moon and now I understand why I was confused about my type due to the placement.

What I am wondering is whether INFP with scorpio moon would do well with the Fe solution for INFJ or if they should stick with INFP solution of physical expression?

Trying to dislodge from stuckness. Thank you all!

Also my partner has scorpio moon as well, but his is conjunct jupiter which actually gives him much jolly flavor and the scary stuff is largely unconscious unless expressed in music.


#8

I relate to this. Being an infp is so weird. It does feel mushy.
I get paranoid too because when I read “infps and intps are easy to deal with” part of me is like uh yeah but do you think we like the dark interpretation of that? That we can just be manipulated with the right few smoothing over?
But I know it’s just a natural dynamic. If you can apply pressure on a person you will. It’s kind of a law almost. It’s almost as simple as would you do things the hard way when there is an easy way? No. I think it’s the same. If there is someone there you can apply pressure to and it’s very easy for you to think of how to influence someone, then you will. So it actually makes sense to me that someone with great interpersonal skill and push will come to inps and be like “well they’re not a problem, I’ll just say this and this, appeal to their this and this” but I hate it


#9

Yes, smoothing. I also notice that it does not take much for me to forgive someone even if I was hurt gravely. I guess we just want so badly for things to be ok, or maybe we have a lot of essential faith that may seem stupid to others. It’s hard to embrace this because self abandonment is an issue, and inability to resolve or bounce back from conflict unless LOTS of time passes is a drag. :smiley:


#10

oh man, FELLOW infp. I know exactly what you mean. it’s actually a really sucky feeling although probably also a strength. what a weird way to be. intp has something similar in that they will not give themselves justice either. and they are also disadvantaged by complete emotional confusion.

hey that moment where you’re like “this person goes through the same thing”. those words I quoted I know exactly what you’re talking about exactly exactly exactly.


#11

Aw, I feel comforted. <3

I go through these periodic nights of “I have to get out of this and protect myself and stop letting self get hurt because too sensitive for relationship!” and it’s terrible and sometimes even feeling like casually suicidal but then person appears, apologizes and displays a little vulnerability, and all is forgiven. :no_mouth:

So, sometimes dissonance around whether I am taking care of myself, but I think if I were to protect myself 100% I would live in a tower and never speak to anyone, so INFP just have to live and get hurt. As scorpio moon I can’t really date super soft people so, my destiny is periodically going to hell.

What is your moon?


#12

Sometimes I’m like, “Gee I should make them try harder” but this doesn’t happen. What is this nature? :astonished:


#13

how interesting.

my moon is pisces.

I can be with a soft person. but I tend to need “emotional insensitive” which is really messed up. but it just feels right when someone tells me that my feelings are wrong. I am attracted to it or at least I can’t do anything about it and it’s a very intimate feeling that goes back way back to my parents possibly. probably the definition of an infp or something.haha.

but it’s weird. like it really hurts. but I really need someone to tear apart my feelings. the resulting disorientation feels very “familiar” my husband does that for me regularly. could be because I am tooooo infp. the only thing that can balance that is a tear-down.


#14

wow. I know this. dang.


#15

Ahhhh I relate to this. I do have strong neptune angle in my chart so underlying pisces tendencies…

I also like when someone shows me my feelings may not reflect reality. HOWEVER I would like emotional respect. Stonemilker - Bjork style. But T people don’t really work that way. So it’s painful. I hate when ppl say feelings are wrong! They are not wrong, they just are. They may not be helpful to the situation though. Which, to some people, is Wrong. lol.


#16

I have noticed that INFP like to try to milk stones.


#17

Ugh, ME TOO. I do not like this, but this is my karma. Maybe you are right; it is about balancing… I was once enmeshed with someone who was not insensitive and deeply loved this person but there was no attraction… no dynamic, just super mushy stagnancy.


#18

I relate to benefiting from someone pointing it out. I usually don’t like it though, because that’s just vulnerable. That’s the absolute pits

Yeah. Kind of like the indifferent clarity of T is so beneficial, but the indifference that sometimes goes with it hurts. Indifference is probably the wrong word. T types aren’t indifferent. Tbh, I have no idea why sometimes it hurts. It doesn’t make that much sense


you have a scorpio stellium. hmmm. wonder what that’s like


#20

I think it hurts because it doesn’t acknowledge your reality and I don’t think our language or culture has a good way of explaining why or how feelings matter as more than just a way to convince people to buy products. I really don’t know. People don’t experience life or community the same way, but basic respect means not disregarding their reality, no matter if it’s feelings or something else. It’s interesting when I notice myself experiencing pain when the person who is associated or causally linked is totally oblivious to why or how. It forces me to shift perspective which I like.

Re: scorpio stellium:
I think it makes me INFJ-like when unhappy. When I am not in throes of despair I think I exhibit INFP. I’m like one of those color-changing hotwheels cars.


#21

I’m sorry this is going to be a series of pretty stupid questions but I have little to no astrology knowledge and I want to understand before I put in my $0.02:

You can have a stellium in a sign?? I thought it was only for houses…what’s the relative strengths of having a stellium in the same zodiac sign and house?? Is there any difference in meaning?

It definitely sounds like you’re an infp at the core though based on your rapport with Lunar and my experiences with infps (what can I say? You guys make the best friends that inspire me to be a better person)…