Sorry for the lame title.
So I’ve been reading through all of Blake’s stuff about the Fe-solution for INFJs, and I keep feeling like it’s really inspiring, but also that I’m hitting some kind of wall in understanding / applying it.
One of my problems at the moment is how to apply the flowing, playful free-form INFJ expression stuff with the desire to create something more, something bigger – in my case a novel, though I guess this would apply to anything longer: a symphony, painting, etc. How do you stay interested in expressing the same stuff for long enough to write a novel – and if you’re not interested, not loving it anymore, do you just let the novel go, or come back to it later? How do you sustain free-flowing Fe-expression over the course of a long work, without it collapsing into a series of random impressions? How can you Fe all over the place while still keeping enough consistency or planning to make things, you know, actually make sense – a process that for me seems to bring up the Ni-Ti loop (how does this character’s actions in ch. 3 cohere with what I said of them in ch. 8; what themes am I trying to convey and have I chosen the right means to do so; what kind of genre or conventions am I adhering to and what do I do with the parts that don’t conform) and especially the fucking Te superego (strict page counts; questions of whether I’m achieving what I set out to do; questions about whether my stuff is significant enough to be effective at . . . something, some mission I’ve set for myself) I know artistic expression is supposed to be something like salvation for us, but lately its been just another way I get stuck; it feels like without the Ti and Te stuff I’ll never produce anything weighty enough to be worthwhile.
I’ve also been kind of confused about the concept of the Fi id vs. the whole “play INFJ play” thing. So the Fi id means we have all this poisonous emotion bubbling up into the unconscious, but we’re supposed to drain it by expressing it, right? But we’re also supposed to play and have fun and learn to be light and humorous. Is the idea that our work will have this biting acidic edge to it but also be fun and lighthearted? Or more that the process of creating should be light and fun, even if the content is poisonous? I feel like every time I try to express it comes out heavy and pretentious: not poison so much as sludge. Thoughts?