Can you be BOUGHT?


#1

I was discussing with friend about whether or not someone can be bought. Their loyalty, etc.

Apparently INFJ are very buyable with money? Because it has an Fe component? HMMM…
What say you INFJ, or anyone else!

INTJ… I think, they do not understand Fe that well, so they are happy to receive money, but what they do after that may or may not appease the person they received money from unless there’s an explicit contract signed? "You didn’t tell me what the money was for, so even if it was just ‘implied’, too bad! I use for my own purpose! :3 "

…But maybe everyone should give me money and we will find out if my loyalty can be bought! [holds out hand for money] ‘-’/
For like… science.


#2

Oh wow. what an interesting point.

made me ponder.

such a raw statement though. I love it.

i think there’s some truth to it.

my wife(Fi user) won’t do anything for money. she doesn’t care.

actually… My whole family uses Fi except me.

i think it’s kind of true.

i could definitely see an ISFJ doing things for money
like they would be tempted?

and I can see isfp, as far as my wife goes, would be like “fuck you” if someone offered her money for something bizarre.

because I negotiate a lot with my business
so I know how it goes.
there’s an ENFP guy that I do business with, it’s not really about the number for him. it’s something else. kind of like Fi loyalty or something.
it’s tricky. Idk exactly what it is.

I’m trying to recall my interactions with Fe users to see how they responded to money.
but the only way I can picture is them using their Fe charm as their payback.

i think Fi takes a gift and doesn’t feel the “need” to payback. but of course they show genuine appreciation.

but I think it’s because Fe feels the need to “show” appreciation or payback so I guess in that sense their ‘loyalty can be bought’


#3

Yeah, I think that is what the Fe gesture of money is about. They feel an obligation to “repay” in a way that the other party will appreciate. Even if for INFJ, their Fi-id will make them hate themselves a little bit for it because it’s “corrupt”? hahaha!
I guess Fi can be pretty ungrateful at times or will even refuse money if they think it means some kind of weird deal.

I wonder if a buncha infj avoided this thread because they were offended because HMPH HOW DARE YOU! I CANNOT BE BRIBEDDD!!! lol But I feel like INFJ sometimes do take unappealing deals for survival reasons and THEN beat themselves about it afterwards.


#4

yeah you definitely exposed kinda shameful thing about infj or Fe in general and it’s so raw I love it.

Fi DOES come off ungrateful.
sometimes.

in that sense I prefer Fe over Fi

but damn. I’m curious to see which infj will come forth first and admit to this disgraceful act. hahah

but Fi seems to value something else though.
they’re definitely appreciative. but I’m not sure what that is.
I think being their company is one.
Hmmm


#5

At first I thought “No, this is way off-base for INFJs”, but after some consideration (about 2 second’s worth!) I had to concede that there may be something to it.

For example, there have been times during my career when I have felt (like many other public sector scientists) that my salary was inadequate compensation for my experience, skills and responsibilities. But that didn’t change the fact that I was being paid by the employer and therefore was obligated to fulfil my part of the deal by working to the best of my abilities during my contracted work hours.

This (Fe?) work ethic is deeply embedded in my psyche, such that if I feel that I have spent longer than I should on personal matters, I will make up the time by staying later or taking work home to do. This has nothing to do with how I might be perceived by work colleagues or managers (I doubt they would even notice!), but is more about my personal ethics around fairness and contractual obligations (both formal and informal).


#6

Ha! I can see where that came from, completely.

So I would say… it’s a matter of perception!

Going off my personal experience and preferences, I definitely like the finer things. So yeah, often, from many options I will pick the one which is the most financially gratifying ( esp for the future, as opposed to just the here and now), but when faced between the choice of money and fulfilment, I will choose fulfilment every time.

I think what helps me rationalise the choices is the Fe, which is far more fluid as a judging function than Fi. So for example, my INFP friends tend to be more fixed in terms or morals, but at the same time more able to correctly self diagnose their emotional state. I’m not that great at telling how I’m feeling, and often get down a rabbit hole about stuff. Then what helps me make a decision is to talk about the issue with someone else. It’s the Talking and not the advice that is crucial. It’s as if verbalising my thoughts gave me access to my feelings, or a more precise grasp on them. I’m not sure if other Fe types experience it the same way.

So, back to being bought. for ages I would entertain a relationship with an esfj, with whom we were mutually toxic to each other (the utter misery of the relationship of supervision), but he had a good career and was grounded and traditional and was going to look after me and not resent it. So, even if deep down I knew I wasn’t feeling fulfilled, I let it go on for far too long. Socionics calls INFJs aristocrats (in the sense of being hierarchical) and maybe that plays a part. Maybe money is just a route to the top, and we know INFJs strive for recognition!

Here is an accurate description:

The IEI female

Excerpts:

  • She always looks fragile and sophisticated. She spends a lot on clothes, adores beautiful things.

  • She has a unique antelope behavior – ready to be the pray in any time, only if the hunter is worthy of her.

  • She adapts well in life, has a mystic charm that makes even the most penny – pinching bosses give her a raise, ticket constructors let her go with a warning and salespeople sell her things with discount.

I definitely care about money, mostly because it’s the route to security, and I’m always striving for security. I have recently started investing in the stock market and that’s been very entertaining for my brain. Ticks off ‘strategy’ and ‘future planning’ and 'Information addiction" off my list. A new hobby. A way to plan for tomorrow and get excited about it. Adds a bit of much needed variety to my life.

Now, I’ve not known anyone as prone to getting excited about index trackers, as the only fellow INFJ i talked to about it recently. INFPs and ISFPs aren’t that bothered. My ISFJ dad prefers to live in the now.

Others see us as money obsessed. But I think we do get obsessed with new ideas. And we need security.

To the outside world, that’s way simpler, and so yes, I guess we can be bought, as long as internally we can adapt our values to whatever is required.
If we see something as ‘wrong’ then no way Jose!


#7

[quote=“Katnip, post:6, topic:409”]I’m not that great at telling how I’m feeling, and often get down a rabbit hole about stuff. Then what helps me make a decision is to talk about the issue with someone else. It’s the Talking and not the advice that is crucial. It’s as if verbalising my thoughts gave me access to my feelings, or a more precise grasp on them. I’m not sure if other Fe types experience it the same way.
[/quote]

Yes I do experience Fe as you describe it, @Katnip

Do you sometimes find yourself thinking out loud when you are confused about something but there’s no-one around to Fe with?


#8

And of course by making ourselves desirable and turning on the “mystic charm” we increase the possibility of attracting a mate with good financial prospects to keep us in the lifestyle we prefer. Worked for me, anyway…


#9

The answer is no, especially when someone paid me to do something that is going to violate my personal ethics and values. I would rather be poor than take that money.

When I wanted to give someone a gift, this is because I wanted to do it, not because I am seeking for reciprocation. So, when someone gives me a gift, I expected the same as well. I guess that’s why Fi is view as ungrateful.

Also, how do I define our friendship/relationship via material? I felt like I am degrading our friendship if I do payback something material wise. Hence, I would rather accept the gift you have given me and cherish it from the bottom of my heart.


#10

I felt like I am degrading our friendship if I do payback something material wise. Hence, I would rather accept the gift you have given me and cherish it from the bottom of my heart.

I think a lot of INFPs think this way, and this illustrates for me why MBTI can be very useful from a practical standpoint. Because until I realized “this is just how INFPs are”, and started applying this realization to people I knew, it just felt like they were being moody/ungrateful when people (i.e. me) would do stuff for them or give them a gift and they don’t so much as say a simple “thank you”.

Now I know (and more experience with them has shown me) those people are probably just, uhhh, feeling their deep feelings of happiness in their heart or whatever.

Like. Silently.

Anyway stuff like this is a big part of why Fe users often think Fi-doms are rude or ungrateful. When they’re not really ungrateful, they’re just not showing their gratitude, but Fe dom/aux usually wants to see some outward indication of it, or else it feels thrown back upon itself.

I think each respective type understanding how the other operates can go a long way in smoothing over interpersonal relationships.

Anyway to address Prax’s question, I don’t think you can outright bribe an INFJ. They’d find it insulting. But I think Fe-aux types would feel a certain loyalty to someone who’s helped them out in the past, even if that person is later doing something that goes against the IxFJ’s personal values.

So maybe in that sense, to a point, their loyalty can be “bought” by gestures of support or concern (which can indeed include money).


#11

Well said, @Wendy


#12

No, I don’t understand Fe very well, money seems like it should be easy though. If it’s a contract in exchange for a task, I want to know exactly what the task is and I’ll do it as well or better than expectations- done! No loyalty beyond that, if there’s a lot of emotional and intangible crap wrapped up in it, I probably won’t deal with them again. Bribery, no, lots of ways to make money, don’t need it. With general help or intangible gifts, I will express gratitude, but also try to find a way to pay back, if not possible to the person directly at least to the universe. I’m no aristocrat, but I’m nobody’s peasant either.