Jesus is my daddy and I really want


I always felt like someone was watching me masturbate. And it felt religious. This is actually true.

I do have fetishes of banging Jesus though. You know, him saving me from a life of whoring it up, just to have me all to himself. Lovely. “Drink my blood, child.” I’ll drink more than that. Can I get an AMEN?!

Yeah, I never got religion. But it serves a purpose for us chaotic-y animals.

Existencial crisis.

Altruism doesn’t exist! But you already knew that you doggo you.


It depends on Jesus interpretation, certainly there are some hot Jesuses around, some have amazing abs, so yeah, literally, fuck Jesus.


Nah. You’ve mistaken me for someone else. I don’t care about abs. It’s a spiritual fuck. Savior / sacrifice / holy. Someone who’s worshipped worshiping me. That kinda shit. It’s hot. Really hot.


Oh I see. To me the sexual power comes by being desired by others, including but not limited to power figures. I never thought of Jesus that way, but truth be told I almost never think of Jesus.


Hmmm that’s interesting. The sexual power I really get off on is the power created between two people. That energy. That give and take. In the flames together. I don’t like looking at sexual power as one over another. I’m not talking about dom/sub stuff either, because that power can be created together even if someone technically “holds” the power over the other. Do you know what I’m saying? It’s hard for me to explain. I don’t want to trail too far off of the thread’s purpose. But these are the things that occupied my mind when I was younger (and still today). I mean, life and death is just natural for Scorpio. But what kept me up at night was wondering if I’d find someone to just spill my soul to. Or maybe it was wondering if someone could find my soul. Eh, I dunno.


I only got to see the first Erika post about masturbating to Jesus. Missed all the rest :frowning:


I do get what you’re saying, @Ankh; as you’re describing the exchange of energy between different polarities. Like electricity, the flow of current from high potential to low.

This is what makes the purpose of sex about much more than simple procreation; it can also be one of the most profound spiritual experiences available to humans. An essential truth that has been largely forgotten by our hypocritical modern society, after centuries of religious repression and guilt-tripping moral condemnation.


Yes, yes, yes! Thank you, @Stewart.

The deeper and more spiritual parts of sex. Wonderful! The knowing without speaking. Both giving. Together. Hand in hand. It is a great power. The greatest. And it can only be achieved with another. Wow, I sound like a virgin. In a lot of ways, I still am. Thanks for your understanding.


What were you going to say, Rum puppy?


I see, actually that’s what the whole Kamasutra is about, right? That exchange of energy @Stewart talked about. It’s interesting that point of view. To me sex is somehow more earthly. The whole flirtation and such matters are the game part, a whole play and when I enjoy being challenging. But when it comes to sex is all about closeness. I enjoy watching and touching and getting the whole sensorial thing of the other because, through it, I feel the other, or at least the true self of the other, and that makes me feel close to him/her, which to me is a lot. I love to decipher the looks of the others all the time, but in sex you get something else, some other side of each individual and that makes me feel that we get to know each other in some deep level.


Oh, yes. I love these talks. I could talk all day about sex. Ha.

I am very inexperienced in this realm that is maybe why I crave to know so much more. It frightens me at the same time because to reach this level of closeness, you have to shed your flesh. And my flesh is what has protected me all these years. I am an extreme person. An all or nothing person. It is very hard for me to find balance and compromise. It’s rare to find someone who is willing to compromise with fire and ice. I’m not sure exactly where I’m going. I trust Anh’s judgement to split this when it becomes …

Oh and Kamasutra - I’ve surprisingly not read too much into it. But there’s a movie which shares the same name and it was impactful to me. Yes, the flirting and shit like that is a selfish energy. I’m not saying I don’t partake or like to partake in such things. But my true dream sounds more like a scene from a sci-fi movie. Ha!


To me everybody is lonely in one way or another. We’re restricted to our own subjectivity, to the things we see, we think and we percieve, and that’s natural. Everyone is going through their own path, with their own thoughts and personalities. But when it comes about sex, to me is going out of that path for a few minutes/hours and get close with somebody else. And is lovely to experience it. Is lovely to meet with other people’s needs, both, emotional and physical, and see them being fullfilled. That’s pretty Fe, right? Hahahaha

@Ankh oh yes I love to talk about sex too. And I was also expecting the split of the thread.


It’s beautiful.

But like, oh jeez this is gonna sound maybe weird. Like… when two people have sex - this spiritual sex I speak of… like… (I’m saying like a lot)…they are no longer human. They’re no longer any one thing. They’re the universe. They’re everything and nothing. They’re creation, nebulous… There is a deep passion but a patience in it as well. A perfectly executed ballet of volcanoes and tsunamis. Eh…something like that??? Don’t know, never have had it… but I want it.


I see. It’s just that it seems a real deep level of intimacy. As I’ve read in your last posts I hope you find it soon. I think I had something similar with my boyfriend but maybe not as intense as you describe it.


I’ve felt something like this in meditation. It feels like sex because of the intimacy, but without the bodies getting in the way. With bodies there’s a coarseness that can’t be avoided. There’s a boundary between flesh and flesh that cannot be crossed even though we try by pressing, and insertion, and exchanging fluids. The kind of union that can be felt in meditation is thorough. Sometimes it feels like every particle is being hugged very gently. The sense of you and other blurs. It’s the most un-lonely I’ve ever felt.


Like what do you mean? You shared the same space with someone else and meditated with them?
I have bombs (I’ll call them bombs) of pleasure sometimes. It will just hit me, literally. Like, I’ll be talking to someone at work about something and something feeling like ecstasy hits me. Hard to explain. Seems insignificant to do so.

I am intrigued but at the same time, I need the fleshy coarseness. Slapping of skin. Sweating. Imperfections. Peeps. MOaNs. Leg cramps. All of that.

This is most interesting.


It can happen meditating alone or with others, it does not matter. I don’t know if it is a connection with some one, or some thing, or everything. I like your word, “pleasure bomb.” Yes, it feels like a pleasure bomb that blurs everything except the pleasure. It’s a complete immersion.


Yes! Blur. Yikes! I’ve felt like I would faint sometimes. Like an image instantly crosses my mind. And it’s like, yeah, a PLEASURE BOMB! Haha. :bomb::boom:

And blur is a very important word in this context. Because it feels like a dream.

So what the fuck, crane. You just sit in peace and quiet and pleasure bomb yourself?


When things are going well, yes. It happens