Life's Special Moments


#1

I like to think that life is all about connections.

We are all the same. We are all one. We’re made out of stars. Each item in our universe looks different, acts different, and reacts different from another, but we’re the same. It’s a fun exercise to differentiate. It’s a logical exercise. It feels good to exercise our big brains in this way.

But, anytime I feel a connection to something or someone, there is a more special, gratifying feeling I get. I often have funny feelings or experiences that are hard to put into words. Maybe they shouldn’t be put into words. Maybe they should just be mine to keep. Or, maybe I should share them. And you should too. Maybe, just maybe, we can make someone feel the same thing by telling them what we saw and felt.

This area is for little special interactions you may encounter in your daily life.

We all run on routine. Get up, clean up, get the kids to school (if you have kids), pat the pets on the head or pet your pet named Pat on the head (ha), then go to work or clean the house, eat, go to bed, then start all over the next day. Where are the little moments? The ones that make you think, “Alright…I guess it’s okay to be human.” The times an old person smiles at you. The time you laugh so hard you almost piss your pants. Okay, let’s be real, you did piss your pants. The times your child says something that blows your mind. The times you do a good deed or see a good deed being done.

It’s all the small things that make the big thing called life. I want to hear them.

Your little moments that add up to life. Your life. And thus, our life.


#2

Okay this may not be what you are looking for, but one time I took a battery out of my coat pocket and it was so hot. I loved it because I never could figure out why. Burning hot. Let’s call it a little thing:) probably has a simple explanation. Maybe something physical inside.


#3

I have someone in my life who shares special moments all the time. On the surface, it seems like, “Okayyyy, who the fuck cares?! That’s so insignificant to everything that’s going on in my life or anyone’s life”, but when we relax a little and enjoy the moment for what it is, a moment, it’s truly special. It a domino effect. A tiny moment can trigger memories or desires. It can make us content in a moment of chaos. It can light a fire under our ass to change the world.

This is not my moment; I will have some to share later. But this is what lit a fire under my ass to make this thread:

Pete:
I was bringing away empty bottles today
recycling
And empty cans
You knooow… Ravioli, tomato, beans…
From all that canned shit
There are containers for glass, and old paper
And I was throwing in the bottles and cans
and there was an old man with a dog
A different old man than last time
With a different dog
And he was throwing away old newspapers
and he looked over to me. And he smiled
and he said: "There is still space in the containers today. A rarity. Really a rarity"
And somehow this made me happy
Me:
That is so lovely
It’s like
A connection
Pete:
Yeah
Me:
Touching life
Pete:
I just said: Oh, that is great
and he nodded
and said: The paper containers. You know? The ones for glass… they are usually not so full
and that was it
Me:
Ha
Very cool
Pete:
It`s… I don’t know… like you said: connection
for a brief moment
like
"You and me - we are equal"
recognizing and acknowledging each other


#4

I’m looking for it all, @lunar! :slight_smile:

This is great!!! I know what you mean! It’s a feeling. You can feel it! You’re alive!

You know that feeling when you almost drop something and you’re trying to juggle it and you heart skips a beat and your stomach does a flippy-flop? That just happened to me today. And afterward, I laughed. It was just me at home today. So, no one to see. No one to laugh with. Just a feeling like, “Jeez Erika, flail your arms a little more, freak.” Hahaha.


#5

This is fun. Laughing out loud when no one is around is a good sign:)


#6

Okay. One time there was a very dignified looking man attending all the seminars. White hair. Serious look. Suitcase. Typical posture. He was there at coffee break. I would do circles around him like I did around the profs usually. He went home after work at same time. Crossed the same park. Eventually I asked who is he?

Well…turns out he was like an enthusiast who didn’t talk to anyone else. I guess you could say imposter except he wasn’t bothering anyone. He had nothing to do with the dept. Lol. He was more regular than his “colleagues” On a real schedule.


#7

@lunar, I don’t know what’s more awkward. Laughing with yourself or trying to laugh in front of strangers like everything is cool.

When I was younger, trying to look like a hot babe walking down the street in some high heel wedges, I ALMOST fell. I wish I would have fallen. I tripped and instead of falling, I swung my arms around low to the ground like a freaking orangutan. I could feel everyone’s eyes on me, just wondering what I was doing. And afterward, it was like, “Haha, that was funny right?” And seeing everyone’s faces like, “That girl has problems, maybe she shouldn’t wear heels.” It should also be known that I’m already 6 feet tall, sooooo…yeah…it was a display.


#8

Tehe incognito professor. Gosh, we just have no idea who is walking next to us…yikes!


#9

Well, this happened over Christmas Break.

I was speaking to my little sister about the oldest (me) to the youngest (her) out of our siblings. When we get to her being the last, she looks a little sad playing with her barbie doll and says “I wish I was the oldest sister so that I could take care of y’all and watch over y’all”.

I was mildly shocked by this. She is just a little girl, why is she worried about taking care of me and my siblings? It was strange to me, so I gave a little laugh and said “Why? So you can give us presents?”. I think I had just gotten her something from the store.

So she gets serious and says, “Well if y’all do right by me and y’all are nice to me”. And I just paused, cause fuck. That is what an older sibling is, and in that moment, she sounded SO much older than me. Like a grandmother.

And after that I just sat and contemplated about being the eldest sibling and how it is pretty much my job to watch over my siblings and to take care of them and give them presents. It was weird that the baby of the family would want to be the eldesr sibling, so I just felt mushy, cause I think she sees how much I care for her and our siblings and it’s cute to think she would want to follow my example (she is in elementary school and I’m in college so connecting with her can be hard for me). Yeah, that was a nice moment.


#10

That is so beautiful! I am the eldest too. I have a younger sister. I can understand how distant you must feel from the youngest sometimes since you two have such a large age gap. But, wow, this is beautiful how her statement “brought it home” for you. Thank you for sharing! :sunflower:


#11

Yeah, no problem! It can be hard with the age gap but at least I can help with homework. :100::grinning::blush:


#12

No idea…but are enfj often cute clumsy when they aren’t the dancers? Like not fully coordinated but then so hot/cuddly it doesn’ t matter. :slight_smile:
Whenever there is a girl, say on Facebook, to give an example, that when she posts a pic, there are 1 million you are so beautiful comments, I swear it is always an enfj:)


#13

No idea as well. I can only speak for myself. Yes, when I dance, I’m ON POINT. Haha…but daily living is a little tough for me. I blame my mom. I run into walls, trip up the stairs, drop stuff alllll the time, and break things. It’s funny, when ever I come over to my husband for snuggles, he takes off his glasses off because he knows there is a short period of time where I destroy everything in my path to get tucked in just right. All of this clumsiness makes for random bruises too. It’s painful being clumsy.


#14

Last year… in Feb… I went on a trip with my friends to the mountains… we needed to book an air bnb for our stay… while looking for places we came across one that looked pleasant… the reviews were good except that all of them said that the caretaker, a woman called Bonnie, was rather nasty… we didn’t really care about people being mean so we booked the place anyway…

When we got there, she was kinda cold and reserved… it almost felt like we were infiltrating her territory and she would do whatever it took to defend herself… she had a dog, who was very friendly… she was not… she did deliberate things to annoy us… like not giving us the food we had ordered and telling us that three people couldn’t share a room so we’d have to pay double… but I felt like she was just testing us… i sensed something fragile beneath the facade… a history of wounds she didn’t want people to see… she was anything but weak… fragile but strong… like she could crack but never bend or break… my friend and I are big on vibes… so we wanted to get to the bottom of the melancholic vibes we were getting from her… we were polite and didn’t get in her way… spoke to her with respect and asked her a lot of questions about herself… she was a pro at avoiding talking about things she didn’t want to reveal… but she warmed up to us anyway… on our last day there she said she wanted to show us something… her dog was leading the way, wagging his tail… we followed them down the road we had become familiar with… took a turn we usually walked past… after walking a while we reached some kind of small hidden valley with a stream flowing through it… she said that this was her spot… this is where she always came when she was angry or upset or just wanted to relax… this is where she’d been coming since she was a kid… she wanted to show it to us because we had been nice to her and she felt like we would appreciate it for the right reasons… that felt soo good… felt like sharing a piece of someone else’s history… I don’t know how to describe the actual feeling… it was happiness + melancholy + nostalgia… something deep in the chest… the gut reacts to dangerous things… the heart reacts to the safe… I still remember how proud she was of her secret hideaway… still think of her sometimes and try to decode the secrets behind the pride and freedom in those lonely eyes… that shy reluctant smile… and that hard line of the jaw… :slight_smile:


#15

This is a wonderful story @piggie. Thank you for sharing! Props to you for be patient and curious and not deciding she was a bitch and moving on. There is always a story behind the flesh.


#16

Happy Saturday, everyone!

I had a revelation the other day that I wish to share with you, or this space, or whatever…

I was working, and everyone got an email for a last minute call-in meeting. There was no information as to what this meeting was about. Just a spur of the moment type thing.

To all of our surprise, it was one of the Directors with an announcement that she is retiring. This is someone who oversees our department and a couple of others, but she doesn’t have daily interactions with us, so I’m sure everyone had a distant feeling towards this interruption in our day. But then she started to say, “This might come as a surprise to some of you because I’ve never talked about retirement, and actually, I’m probably a few years early. But, most recently, probably within the last year, I’ve realized that life is short. I want to enjoy the rest of what life has to offer.”

BOOM!

And something hit me. It hit me hard. Just - “Life is short.” And I zoomed out. I zoomed way out. I zoomed so far out, I could see our tiny blue planet suspended in time. Suspended in space. And I tried to find me. Tiny me on this tiny, but comparatively large planet. And I realized, life is short.

I am an ENFJ, and I am extremely driven in career life. I’ve gone through many stages to get where I am now. Only five years ago, I was riding my bike to work because we couldn’t afford another car. After being donated an '88 Olds 98, I was able to get a different job. Farther away, this company would be able to pay for schooling. After some time, I was able to purchase a modern car (with air bags), which was good, because my internship was an hour away. And now, I have finished some schooling, I have a degree, and two certificates. I work from home and have a steady, comfortable income. I feel like I could continue schooling. Become a leader in some format. Make more money. Make more of an impact.

“Life is short.”

After listening in on this short conference call with an even shorter message, I made a huge decision. To not continue schooling for a higher degree. My husband is very cool with it, however, I have not told my family. I know they will support me and my decision, but I am still deathly afraid of looking like a failure.

I have professional and educational mentors who have always told me - you will be leading. You’re a leader. I’ve heard it all of my life actually. This has motivated me in the professional part of my life. I’ve put all of my energy towards this. Towards education and networking and being better, making more money, having the potential to do more stuff, have more stuff.

“Life is short.”

After this phone call, it dawned on me. Why am I continuing my education? My answer: To make more money; to be a leader. And I began to imagine my life with “more money”. I would be working more, most definitely. I would have to travel to work. I would have more stress, and yes more money, but time to enjoy it? I don’t know. So I thought, why not have less money, and more time - instead of the other way around?

This may not seem like a huge deal to most, but for me, I made the most impacting decision to stay content with where I currently am and focus my energy on life outside of work. Because, there are more important things in life than money and work.

It will take me a little while to get over my pride. It will take some time to convince my brain that there is more to life. But I know I will win my brain over. My soul will help :sunny:

Because, after all…

Life is short.


#17

You seem the kind of person that could land on your feet no matter what decisions you made. That is good to know. There can always be new and interesting decisions therefore and a way forward. That is exciting!


#18

Hi Erica, life is short. I came to this conclusion yesterday looking after a 90 year old stranger. I asked her questions, but she couldn’t remember much stuff about her life at that moment. Before I knew it her son was showing me how to wipe her after she goes to the bathroom. It was a bit overwhelming. She still enjoys her meal but is very dependent. She lit up at the idea of my kids coming over one day. So yeah.

How do we max it out?


#19

Just a reminder - EriKa. (K is for kool).

I just want to make sure I am understanding your question: Are you saying, “How do you maximize life, to the fullest?”

Holy shit. Heavvvyy, man. I think a big part of it is happiness. What makes each person happy differs greatly, so “happy” can be difficult to find. When we live in a very materialistic world and “keeping up with the Joneses” is present in our minds, it’s a challenge to step back and really, truly find out what makes us happy.

Circle of life: You have your ass wiped in the beginning and the end of life. In the beginning, it’s a little easier (hopefully) because you have mom and dad to wipe your ass and it’s cute. When we get to be 90, we’re children again. And (hopefully) your children are there to wipe your ass, and it ain’t too cute anymore.

This sounds beautiful. Imagine how she must have felt. “Oh! Children! So young, so full of life! So much to do and experience.” It must be a wonderful privilege to be that aged and see young people and know. Know what? Exactly. Even knowing that heartache and troubling times most likely will come to all of us, it is a beautiful thing when you are older. It’s almost comical, right? And if your children have the opportunity to visit this woman, wow. I think it’s super important for kids to have interactions with older people. It’s a timeline. Children at the beginning, older people at the end, and you are smack dab in the middle. Children have a bright outlook, and energetic outlook. Older people have a calm peace. And you (us), wish for something but don’t know what. Maybe that’s why having children is one of life’s greatest experiences. Because you (hopefully) have the ability to see the timeline and feel the circle and eventually, be lucky enough to die with happiness in your heart and peace within your soul.

Amen! This is important to remember. I try to calculate too much. I just need to learn how to accept things, be open, and take chances. Because you are right, there is always a way forward.


#20

Erika, sorry about your name!